Sunday, 7 October 2012

Love Removal Machine

No game to report on. hashtag sadface.
(I've tweeted this before, but why is it 'hashtag' and not 'poundsign' or 'numbersign'? Hashtag is British (poundsign is american and numbersign is canadian) but yet Twitter is American?) but I digress.

So, I'm writing this as I listen to Jay and Dan's (or Dan and Jay's) podcast. hashtag instant classic.
(what, you use # instead of writing hashtag, got it).

Two things. 1) I should do a podcast. Cause, you know, that's what my 2 followers want. 2) I need a sponsor. You know, cause my 2 blogs and twitter feed shout 'reaching the masses' (especially the <21 crowd. #Sigh).

Apparently, I'm the last person on earth to wear conventional contact lenses. They don't make them anymore, so got switched to disposable. So far, so good. Cue the jokes from players about should have switched earlier. Sigh.

Organizing off season training. Should one of my readers be from the lower mainland, the rest of province doesn't player soccer now! Instead of the standard aerobic conditioning, clip watching and rules discussion, I'm thinking of... improv.

Refer a friend who followers me and you're in a draw to win a dishwasher! *

Hey, up to 107 followers. That's right. 107 people are in the know.

Other famous cults.

1. Church of Bible Understanding

2. Manson Family
3. Aum Shinrikyo
4. Restoration of the 10 Commandments
5. Raëlism
6. Scientology
7. Order of the Solar Temple
8. Heaven’s Gate
9. Branch Davidians
10. Unification Church

Speaking of Cult... 

*not really

Sunday, 30 September 2012

Reality TV

Probably one of the final games of the year for me. I can't do high school league due to early start times.
So, switching to training mode hopefully after thanksgiving. Have organized off season training sessions past couple of years and each year more and more members join. Very excited for this off season and getting more young refs out.

On an unrelated note, watching Amazing Race as I type. Has there ever been a team of two soccer refs?
Seriously, they have Chippendales, so why not two refs? I would watch that.

I have an idea: Ref Camp. 10 aspiring refs are followed 24/7 as they attend a Regional upgrade session. The drama, the tears, the swearing. I would also watch this.

Game Summary:

This was a good game from two competitive teams.
Weather was fantastic so no complaints from me. One team upset with a call early on, but same team had two, yes two, PK's late in game... and only converted one. So, yah.

Stat Line:

half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.54 / 2.9 / 24.5
2nd / 2.67 / 3.2 / 17.3

Total distance thru 90 min 5.21 km

2nd half..

3 cautions, 1 send off.

Game 1: Morgan and Ciaran.


So, players are encouraged to 'skate' when they need to hustle. Are hockey players told to 'run'? #confused.

Broke 100 followers! Now onto 200!

Wednesday, 26 September 2012

Bo knows

Little known fun fact about me... back in the day I used to be Provincial level volleyball referee. I remember refereeing Cariboo College matches whilst in high school. Haven't reffed in a while though. So, I'm at the TRU match the other night and what happens? The officials are short a linesman and the head referee sees me in the crowd. Yup, I was recruited to flag the lines on a University exhibition match.

Good match, but got me thinking. How I felt (nervous) is probably very much like younger, newer officials when they first start. All the more important that the soccer crew works as a team. A great pre-game discussion, warmup, eye contact all help create a team atmosphere and gives a less experienced official a huge confidence boost.

I'm next to the pole, wearing shorts.
Speaking of confidence boost, had two this past weekend. I know, two!
Keep wearing the underarmour cause I think it's going to be cool and I'll need the warmth, but nope, super warm and I sweat a storm. Plus, the black underarmour and ref shorts look is super hot! I've mentioned it before but I think an underarmour kit would kick butt. But I digress...

Game Summary:
Both games were weird in the sense that game 1) was exhibition and game 2) was the last league game that didn't affect the standings (so kinda like exhibition).

Stat Line:
Game 1 (40 min halves)
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.70 / 3.3 / 19.8

2nd / 2.64 / 3.6 / 18.2

Game 2

half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.18 / 2.7 / 20.7

2nd / 2.03 / 2.6 / 17.3

Total distance thru 90 min (game 2)  4.21 km

Yup, 4.21 km. The game didn't need anymore.

Game 1 was so very one sided! or the field markings are off in the overlay image.

Game 2. The track over compensates on to how little I moved.

1 through both game

Game 1: Chris and Bailey (a late night coffee order)
Games 2: Kyle and Quinn (awesome name for a law firm)

El Presidente and Adjudicator

So, back to the volleyball reffing, yes I am a multi sport official. The Bo Jackson of officials if you will.
Sigh, just realized my two readers have never heard of Bo.
Ask your parents, the Bo commercials would cause bars to go quiet.

Wednesday, 19 September 2012

Can't Replace This

Can't beat this Sept weather, that's for sure. And can't beat playoff soccer.
Tracker's working too.

Game Summary:
Felt good, legs much better than the other night. Good to know I can keep up with this league at least.

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.77 / 3.5 / 18.5
2nd / 2.96 / 3.8 / 21.3

Total distance thru 90 min: 5.73 km

Made a conscious decision to keep intensity up through the 2nd so good to see km's higher than first.

Scatter graph of km's by half. Early season when I started tracking is to the left, most recent games to the right. Good trend recently of halves inching closer to 3 km per half. 

The Hynes brothers.


So, I've been thinking about the NFL replacement refs. Can you imagine the pressure these replacements are feeling? For the most part they are lower college level and now they are reffing in the show. Preseason was one thing but now, after two weeks, we're starting to hear things from players and coaches. The league has stats showing the number of calls is roughly the same as the first two weeks as last year. Coaches and players (and commentators) bemoan the calls not made.

I know these replacements are doing the best they can and if they are given enough time they too could probably become good officials at the NFL level. But what a crash course.

Couple of thoughts...
* this really highlights for me why you need to put in the work to be a top official. You need to be fit, know the rules, and put in the time analyzing reflecting on performance and always continuous improvement.
* respect is something earned and clearly these replacements haven't earned it yet. You want to be a top official and you must give respect to earn respect.
* if FIFA locks out its refs and needs an aging District to cover a World Cup tournament, I'd be in. If only for the free kits.

If you're not following me on Twitter, why the heck not. My tweets are funny, insightful and occasionally brings a tear to the eye. Plus, follow me and you get a coll Shout Out.


Sunday, 16 September 2012

Heavy Metal

Well, it's been a while - since I've posted, since I've had a game, and since I've been able to track a full game.
Well, wait no longer! The internet's least read blog (except when Guest poster fills in) is back!
Got some (interesting?) thoughts but those are after the game recap.

Gosh darn my legs felt dead. Like I was running in water. Loosened up by second half but first half was painful.

Game Summary:
Got a new battery so bb works like a charm now. No more cutting out during calls, and more importantly I have enough juice to track 2 halves. Ah, technology, gotta luv it.

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.8 / 3.5 / 29.2 ?!
2nd / 2.38 / 3 / 17.1

Total distance thru 90 min: 5.18 km

Max speed 1st half is a bit off, but I'll take it. Ironic that my legs were dead and I run like the Flash.


Quickly conferred with AR that's why the track deep in AR quadrant.


Linda and Kyle
Good communication and awesome work!

El Presidente

So, I went to a Blazers game Friday (thanks  for the tix). I watched the refs quite a bit. I noticed a couple similarities.
The hockey crew had several instances (that I could see) of communication, lots of subtle hand signals. I know personally I'm working to improve my communication with my teams and it was good to see officials in a different sport on what they do.
The last couple of minutes of intermission they are the first ones on the ice and do couple quick laps to warmup. I generally do a a pre game warm up (albeit quick sometimes), but maybe need to do a sprint or two before 2nd half to get back in the mode?
I really think soccer refs should wear numbers. Hmm, what number would I be? 99... been done. 00... maybe. 69... to obvious but funny.
Regardless of what number my 2 followers wear, they'll always be #1 in my heart!

If you had to list top heavy metal bands it would go something like this:
1 Black Sabbath
2 Judas Priest
3 Iron Maiden
4 Panthera
5 Mothorhead
6 Slayer
7 Metallica (con Cliff Burton)
8 Ozzy Osbourne
9 Black Label Society
10 Magadeh

Until next time, stay thirsty my friends.
And follow me on Twitter, so close to 100 followers.

Friday, 14 September 2012

Mix & Match

Hey there, another guest post by Shake.

Last Weekend: Had the opportunity to watch Darnell Johnson referee a men's PACWEST match.  It was super inspiring watching the kind of field presence he has on the field.  There was no question of who's field it was.

Brainy Stuff:
CBC Radio, Quirks and Quarks host Bob McDonald interviews Dr. Mazyar Fallah, an assistant professor in the school of Kinesiology and Health Science at York University, and delineates research findings regarding the brain and how it processes the colour red. It's rather interesting.  If you'd like to listen to the actual interview, here is the link:
            Fallah elucidates that although motion and locomotion are separate streams from colour, form, and shape – in the brain, they are able to both influence and converse with each other.  Fallah’s research finds that the brain processes speed differently when stimulated by different colours.  For example, while the colour blue is found to be associated as being slow in the brain, the colour red is the opposite.  Red is perceived as moving at a speed greater than any other colour.  This is substantiated through Fallah’s research, which finds that through monitoring the visual processing of different colours – the target colour red provides stimulus that makes the eyes move more quickly.  These research findings lead McDonald to inquire wither there is any impact on sports.  Fallah suggests that in some sports, like figure-skating, where speed plays a vital role – athletes who wear the colour red may be able to make the judges think they are performing at a speed greater than they actually are.  However, while figure skaters that wear red may be able to benefit, Fallah suggests that not all athletes will experience beneficiaries by dressing in red.  For example, hockey teams that dress in red will be stimulating the eyes of the referees more than non-red opponents; therefore more focus on red jerseys may translate to disadvantageous higher foul recognition rates.  To restate, this would be merely because the eyes would be focused on the players wearing red jerseys for a greater percent of the time, which could increase the chances of that player being caught doing something unlawful.   

It is my understanding that questions will likely be raised as to the ethicality and fairness involved with the findings of such a study.  More research and experimental studies will have to be conducted in order to determine how greatly colour can impact the outcome of sporting events.  Perhaps if an unfair advantage is found, the colour red will be banned from certain activities.  What would this mean for countries like Canada – whose national colours include red?  Even if the colour red is found to have a greater impact on certain sports, would it simply be deemed as a part of sport – adversity through which teams must learn to overcome?  To conclude, the findings of Fallah’s study is igniting many questions through which only further research and experimentation can provide answers. 

Tchernikov, I., Fallah, M.  A colour hierarchy for automatic target selection.  PLoS ONE, 5(2): e9338.doi;10.1371/journal.pone.0009338
Some Thoughts By Strimaitis On Pure Motivation:  Author (and millionaire), Adam Strimaitis suggests that generally everyone wants the same things in life.  "Everyone wants to make enough money to buy whatever they want, enough time to do whatever they want and whenever they want to".  He suggests that the determining factor to being able to fulfill those wishes, is motivation.  He doesn't mean having just any motivation either.  He means attaining pure motivation.  The story he used to depict what he believes, is one which he read in some Chicken Soup for the Soul book.  Its synopsis: A professional athlete wins a tournament in which she has beaten over 110 other athletes.  Her reward is a $100,000 check.  After the event, as she walks to her car she is approached by a visibly distraught man.  The man emotionally tells her about his son who is three years old, and has been diagnosed with cancer.  He tells her of the misfortunes that have come his way.  He lost his job, consequently also losing his benefits.  The medical treatments his son needs is more than he can afford.  He is sacrificing his pride in hopes to give his son a fighting chance at having a life.  She did not need to hear any more.  She stopped the man, and without hesitation she pulled out a pen and endorsed the back of her large check to the man.  "I hope this helps." Tears streamed down the man's face, and he gave his thanks.  The winning athlete went home, feeling great.  She won the tournament, and bettered the life of a child.  Later that evening while enjoying a family thrown celebration party, her cousin stood visibly upset, and pointing at the newspaper.  "There's a warning about some man who has been scamming people, and pretending to have a child dying of cancer!"  Everyone awaited the response of the champion.  A look of relief crossed her face, "There is no dying child, well, that's the best news I've heard all day."  The pure motivation for the athlete was to win the tournament, just as it was to help the child to live.  The money was merely a by-product of her objectives; clearly inconsequential.  In the end, the results were that her motivations were fulfilled, and therefore, nothing else mattered.  


Wednesday, 29 August 2012

Catch phrase

Well, finally got in a game. It's been a while with sickness, travel, generally laziness.
Good game overall.

I picked up a pair of shoe inserts over the weekend and must say they felt good.

Something like these
And again, the tracker only recorded first half. I think the app is draining the battery and I need to be fully charged before I start. Stupid bb battery. Must switch to one of these new fangled "iphone". (need more games to pay for said iphone). Somehow the boys have iphones and I don't. Sigh.
Or maybe I'll get a Sumsung knockoff. hmmm
I digress...

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.84 / 3.6 / 19
2nd / 

Total distance extrapolated thru 90 min: 5.68 km

Regular readers of this blog (hahaha 'readers' is plural) know that Mac Island field Google earth overlay used by the tracker is hopelessly out of date. So, close your eyes and pretend the pitch markings line up with the track. Or maybe the game was that one-sided?


Guise sistas.  (notice the spelling of sista... gangster style, cause that's how I roll)

El Presidente

So, whenever I hear certain words or phrases, my mind comes up with a  pop reference.  For example...


Anyone named "Al" I automatically think "Big Gay Al".

The following words or combination of cause me to say "That's what she said": meat, big, huge, package, insert.
I do this automatically.

When I receive a "Thank you Neil" I think, and usually say, "don't thank me, thank the moon's gravitational pull"  Helpful link here

Sad, I know.

hey, 4 away from 100 followers!
Who woulda thunk it.


Saturday, 25 August 2012

Now, how about some fluids with that?

Hey :) Guest blogger shake here again.  I'm starting this post off with inspiration taken from the recent storm.  Thursday's storm inspired me to think of water, which can translate to fluids, which then becomes... urine.  Ha ha ha.  It's been a long week.

Monitor Your Fluid Losses
(Coaching Association of Canada. 2012)
[- well hydrated = light coloured urine
- need more fluid = dark, scant urine]
- Weigh yourself before & right after exercise 
          - Monitoring changes in body weight, and fluid losses allows you to estimate your sweat rate.
          *Sweat rate can range from 0.4-1.8L/hour (depending on the person, sport type and weather conditions)
1.) Weight loss: 60 kg - 59 kg = 1kg lost
2.) Conversion: 1 kg lost = 1 L fluid lost
3.) Total fluids: 1 L fluid consumed + 1 L fluid lost = 2 L total sweat loss
4.) Sweat rate: 2 L sweat loss divided by 2 hours = 1 L of sweat per hour of practice
1 kg weight loss = 1 L of fluid
250 mL = 1 cup = 8 fluid ounces
1 L = 4 cups = 32 fluid ounces
1 kg = 2.2 lbs
          - For example: if someone weighed 60 kg before practice, weighed 59 kg after practice, and during a two hour practice drank 1 L of water - this person's sweat rate would be approximately 1 L per hour of practice.  
          - In order to limit weight loss to 1-2 pounds, this person from the example should try to consume approximately 1 L per hour of practice.

Fluids before exercise:
Try to consume enough fluid daily, in aims to maintain: 
1. weight 
2. adequate urine output
4 hours before exercise: drink 5-7 mL/kg of your body weight (300-500mL)
2 hours before exercise - if you haven't produced urine or if it's still bright yellow: drink 3-5mL/kg of your body weight (150-350mL)

Fluids during exercise:
Every 1 hour: consume about 0.4-0.8 L of fluid 
(130-250 mL / 20 minutes)

Fluids after exercise:
Replace fluid and electrolyte deficits. 
Include sodium with foods or fluids (helps to maintain the plasma electrolyte balance).
Remember, more than 2-3 pounds in weight lost = significant dehydration
          *takes 24-48 hours for complete recovery from this
You can make a fluid replacement drink by mixing:
500 mL unsweetened orange juice
500 mL of water
1.25-1.75 mL of salt

When you travel, remember that in tap water, there are variations in bacteria which can cause gastro-intestinal upset.  Essentially, if you add ice to fluids, it's the same as adding tap water with possible variations in bacteria.

Happy Blurbs From This Week

I normally love refereeing in the rain, but this time it was so ice-like that it felt more like torture.  I kept waiting for hail to start.  Cue the chorus "hummmmm...first world pains".  The "happy" that came out of this game though, was after overcoming perplexity, the revelation that I was assigned to Neil's line!      

I had a women's div one game, with the Hynes brothers working well on the line.  It was a very enjoyable game to referee, so much so, that I was disappointed the halves were cut to thirty-five minutes instead of the normal forty-five minutes.  
Evening Rumination
Reading one of my favourite sport books, and this just illuminated the print from the page tonight:
"Grant me the courage to change what I can,
The serenity to accept what I cannot,
and the wisdom to know the difference."
It helped me to remember.  

Thursday, 23 August 2012

Rain Man

Well, that was wet tonight.
Probably not the best weather for my cough that is sticking around.

Tracked the first half, then battery died and didn't get the second. Re-sigh.

Best part of the night were the AR's. Need to sew a new Velcro patch to Adjudicator current one has lost it's stickiness.

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 2.40 / 3.0 / 16.8
2nd /

Total distance extrapolated thru 90 min: 4.80 km

So, I've been tracking games off and on for most of this season. Below is a chart showing the km's traveled by half. Basically, I cover between 1.5 to 3 km each half. If I had paid attention during College stats class, I could dazzle you with confidence levels, and rattle off some regression analysis. As it is, I can make a (semi) pretty Google Drive graph!


@xxxxEmikoxxxx and Nathan


Top 10 songs about the rain...

1. Brook Benton - "Rainy Night In Georgia" (1970)

Brook Benton - "Rainy Night in Georgia"Courtesy Atlantic
With the single line, "I believe it's rainin' all over the world," soul legend Brook Benton brings the melancholy spirit of the rain home. This record went to #4 on the pop singles chart in 1970 and was the last of Brook Benton's top 10 pop hits. The song has been covered by a wide range of other artists.
"Neon signs a-flashin', taxi cabs and buses passin' through the night
A distant moanin' of a train seems to play a sad refrain to the night
A rainy night in Georgia, such a rainy night in Georgia
Lord, I believe it's rainin' all over the world
I feel like it's rainin' all over the world"
Watch Video

2. Eurythmics - "Here Comes the Rain Again" (1984)

Eurythmics - "Here Comes the Rain Again"Courtesy RCA
The Eurythmics gave us the sound of synthesized rain swirled in with the powerful emotion of unrequited love. This was the Eurythmics' second top 10 pop hit in the US landing at #4 in 1984.
"Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new emotion
I want to walk in the open wind
I want to talk like lovers do
I want to dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you?"
Watch Video

3. Creedence Clearwater Revival - "Who'll Stop the Rain?" (1970)

Creedence Clearwater Revival - "Who'll Stop the Rain"Courtesy Fantasy
Creedence Clearwater Revival use a metaphor of the rain to speak about seemingly endless times of confusion and misery. The song has frequently been tied to frustration with the Vietnam War. "Who'll Stop the Rain" became the band's fourth #2 hit single in 1970.
"Long as I remember the rain been coming down
Clouds of myst'ry pouring confusion on the ground
Good men through the ages, trying to find the sun
And I wonder, still I wonder, who'll stop the rain"

4. B.J. Thomas - "Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head" (1969)

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance KidCourtesy 20th Century Fox
Hal David and Burt Bacharach wrote this song for the soundtrack to the movie Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. In a twist on typical rain songs, it speaks about the inability of the rain to douse faith in the return of happiness. The song won an Academy Award for Best Original Song and after being released in late 1969, it opened the 1970s at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 where it stayed for four weeks.
"Raindrops keep fallin' on my head
And just like the guy whose feet are too big for his bed
Nothin' seems to fit
Those raindrops are falling on my head, they keep fallin'"
Watch Video

5. Beatles - "Rain" (1966)

Beatles - "Rain"Courtesy Capitol
John Lennon explained that the Beatles' "Rain" is ""about people moaning about the weather all the time." Appearing as the B side for "Paperback Writer," the song was one of the very first to utilize backwards vocal tracks. Promotional videos were filmed for "Rain." Click to watch one of those below.
"I can show you
That when it starts to rain
Everything's the same
I can show you"
Watch Video

6. Ann Peebles - "I Can't Stand the Rain" (1973)

Ann Peebles - "I Can't Stand the Rain"Courtesy Hi
Rain does have the ability to usher in painful memories. Memphis soul singer Ann Peebles brings that fact home in powerful fashion here. This became her biggest and only top 40 pop hit reaching #38 in 1973 while landing inside the top 10 on the R&B chart.
"I can't stand the rain 'gainst my window
Bringing back sweet memories
I can't stand the rain 'gainst my window
'Cause he's not here with me"

7. Rihanna - "Umbrella" (2007)

Rihanna featuring Jay-Z - UmbrellaCourtesy Def Jam
Rihanna will help protect you from the rain of life with her umbrella. The metaphor is used here to spell out the value of true friendship. "Umbrella" was an international #1 smash hit in 2007.
"When the sun shines, we'll shine together
Told you I'll be here forever
Said I'll always be a friend
Took an oath, I'ma stick it out till the end"
Watch Video

8. Prince - "Purple Rain" (1984)

Prince - "Purple Rain"Courtesy Warner Bros.
One of Prince's signature songs, "Purple Rain" builds powerful emotion from opening with a lone guitar through powerful rising choruses and ultimately a searing guitar solo. Prince spent two weeks at #2 with "Purple Rain" in 1984.
"I never meant to cause you any sorrow
I never meant to cause you any pain
I only wanted one time to see you laughing
I only wanted to see you laughing in the purple rain"
Watch Video

9. Lou Christie - "Rhapsody In the Rain" (1966)

Lou Christie - The Best of Lou ChristieCourtesy Rhino
Yes, the sound of rain can be a hypnotic accompaniment to making out and going "much too far." The song was so evocative of the sex taking place that many radio stations banned the song. Consequently, it only reached #16 on the pop singles chart, but it remains one of the most memorable hits of pop singer Lou Christie's career.
"Baby, the raindrops play for me
A lonely rhapsody 'cause on our first date
We were makin' out in the rain
And in this car our love went much too far
It was exciting as thunder
Tonight I wonder, where you are?"

10. Carpenters - "Rainy Days and Mondays" (1971)

The Carpenters - The CarpentersCourtesy A&M
Has there ever been a mainstream pop voice so effortlessly melancholy as that of Karen Carpenter? When she says a rainy day gets her down, it's impossible not to believe it. In 1971, this became the duo's fifth consecutive song to reach the pop top 3.
"What I've got they used to call the blues
Nothin' is really wrong
Feelin' like I don't belong
Walkin' around
Some kind of lonely clown
Rainy days and Mondays always get me down."
find your sound we've found ours...

Thursday, 16 August 2012

Titanium Floaties

Ok, I'm writing this on the tab, lets see how this works out.
Second game this week. Felt better, cardio coming back nicely.

Well, that didn't last long. Can't scroll the page, so with the keyboard taking up the bottom half of the screen,  could only see two lines. So back to the laptop it is.

Fun game tonight. Very hot and dry to start, contacts kept drying up.
Water breaks broke the game into 4 quarters. Ok teams, the water break is not a half time, let's not all get comfy under the shade and chill. Sigh.

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 1.16 / 3.1 / 19.8
2nd / 1.28 / 3.4 / 18.6

3rd / .89 / 2.4 / 15.1
4th / 1.45 / 3.5 / 23.0

Total distance thru 90 min: 4.78 km

And really, don't whine about an illegal throw in. Let's review...
* both feet on or behind the touchline - check
* ball behind and over the head - check
* both hands on ball - check
* face field of play - check
* ball enters and point it left field - check

Team was pressing for the equalizer in the final quarter, so pretty good coverage.


 and Nolan

El Presidente.

Things I need to improve:
1) eliminate stupid phases. Eg. (talking to a player about to throw in, not realizing her team has a free kick) "It's a free kick, the ball's on the ground here." Really, the ball is going to be kicked off the ground? How novel. Instead, how about, "it's a free kick here".

2) offside signal. Ok, mechanically the signal is sound, but I really need to bulk up the left arm. I mean Ed Hochuli size. Now that would be an offside signal!

3) speaking of offside, I've been trying to announce offside with a southern drawl, like the immortal Red Cashion's first down call.  Sigh, I know neither of my two readers will get this so...
If anyone can dig up a video or audio clip of the first down call please send it to me for posting.

K, kinda stuck at 61 followers. Need some more. Must spread the word of @_neil_farber.

Tuesday, 14 August 2012


Ok, so first game in like a zillion years.
Games going well, getting some runs in, moving around. Feeling a bit winded, must be near half. What, 10 minutes in! Sigh.

Whistle for half. Hey ref, was that 45 minutes?
Let's see, I wear two watches, one counts up, one counts down, and I have a fitness tracker with a timer. So, yah, lemme check.... double check... triple check... yup 45 minutes.

Stat Line:
half / km / avg speed / top speed
1st / 3.07 / 3.9 / 20.5
2nd / 2.26 / 2.9 / 16.5

Total distance thru 90 min: 5.33 km

Actually kinda surprised by first half. Second half, team was done 2 players so play very much in one half so less movement.

Ok, if you're going to make me start from the penalty area and chase you down on a through ball breakaway to the other half, you had better hit the $%&!@ net. 

Lots of little runs to start game.
First 10 minutes


 and Josh


Team provides a match ball and says they just pumped it up. I comment to the AR's that it's very bouncy, bouncy. Which of course led to humming Fergie throughout the game.

Twitter: @_neil_farber

Sunday, 12 August 2012


Well, I'm back, sort of.
First games in like 5 years are this Tue and Thur. So we'll see how well (bad) I do. Sigh.

And after the guest post yesterday (nearly 10,000 words!)  the internet petition to replace me is in full swing.

In lieu of anything interesting, I thought I'd share some random thoughts...

1) Why can't referees wear sun glasses? Seriously, it's super sunny, my retinas are burning, I'm squinting to make out the different colour jerseys and I can't wear shades? Even the polarized (?) ones that bring out the white (ie ball). A couple refs have the out of production polarized contacts, isn't that the same thing except they are contact lenses? Refs use wireless communication systems and beep flags, so why not sunglasses? Must bring up at next FIFA meeting.

2) I really think officials (all sports) should be available to the press after a match, just like athletes, coaches, managers, trainers, water people are. I would like to get the referee's thoughts on why he/she did/didn't make such and such a call. If an athlete makes an error he's fair game to the media to find out what he was thinking. So why not officials? I suppose the argument is that officials are impartial and call the game by the rules, no questions asked. But we ask coaches why they tried a certain play or made a substitution at a critical junction, so why not ask an official why they didn't make a handball call or whathaveyou. Fans, media, players, coaches, speculate on what goes on in an officials mind, why not let the referee actually tell us?

3) So I had the volume turned up, the chair pulled real close to the tv and all I get is 1.5 spice girls songs? Really, that's the one night only reunion? Phaat. Must say Ginger looked good (was a tad thin after the breakup, see below). Sporty and Scary really showed they were the heavy lifters when it came to singing. Was Posh's mic even on? At the very end of the set (4:29) looked like she wanted to say something but a) her car moved and she had to hang on, and b) her mic was off. Poor Mrs Beckham.

Not sure how long this vid stays up before IOC blocks it...

4) Brian May more than made up for the Spice Girls disappointment.

Alright kids, thanks for tuning in.
Thanks again to the Guest blogger last night! Well done!
And now back to your regular programming...

p.s. get your friends to follow me on "Twitter"  @_neil_farber   Well worth it!

Saturday, 11 August 2012

motley |ˈmätlē|

Hello!  Guest blogger shake here, thus, readers - as the title suggests: prepare for randomness.  (Ahem, and my unfortunate trademark of length -_-.)

Personal perspective, from this August Long Tourney:
"The Good"
- Neil is back in Canada & recovering from having had an awful flu, & bronchitis!
- Being graced with the presence of famous people: Michelle Pye, Kevin Duliba, & Alan Ruch.  [Yes, Michelle & Kevin originated from Kamloops!] & the precious opportunity to learn from them through observing, working with, and conversing with them!  
- Enjoying both, working with, and the good company of local referees, with the addition of more good company - our out of town referee friends & teammates :)  
"The Bad"
- Tight Iliotibial bands
- Did you know that there isn't a way to stretch Iliotibial bands?  You've actually got to roll them out (recommendation?: use foam rollers or tennis balls) to get at those suckers.  
- Failure to follow suit and play elevator music before a game.  Right round by Flo Rida was the last song on the radio...  
"The Ugly"
- Bri Guise saw a team that wanted to be scored on, and perhaps, even had a play for this?!  
- A lady fouled someone, and then hit the dirt in an unfortunate position for her knee.  Chances are high that she's definitely blown her ACL.  
- Mr. Smith winning in-season bowling, & Mr. Calibaba coming out with the playoff win.
- The number of bags & water bottles I was armed with.

Notes regarding the Olympics: Be prepared.  Rumor on the web is that the SPICE GIRLS are performing in the closing ceremonies. 

Ever find yourself slightly hungry in between going from working all day, or working out, and then getting to the field for a game?  
Product Love: SOLO Gi Low Glycemic Nutrition Bars
My naturopath introduced me to this product about a year ago, & I still love them.    
The concept is: 
- helpful way to avoid the "spike, crash and crave cycle" 
- aims to help you live a healthier, low glycemic lifestyle
- "SoLo Gi Bars are specifically formulated with a unique combination of slow release carbohydrates, protein, healthy dietary fats and fiber which provide sustained energy and hunger satisfaction" - Saul Katz, Founder and President 
My favourite flavours are: - Lemon Lift - Chocolate
If you want to try them out, you can get them at Nature's Fair.

FYI: First Aid Tidbits 

If someone is struck by Lightning!

"- Although people generally think that the chance of being struck by lightning is very low, there are many injuries and deaths each year from lightning strikes.
- A person struck by lightning does not hold an electrical charge.  In a lightning strike, the lightning often travels around the person rather than through him - you can touch the casualty without fear of an electric shock.
- The casualty has probably been thrown - suspect a head or spinal injury
- Lightning does strike the same place twice - assess the risk of another strike, and move to a safer location if needed." (In regards to moving the casualty, the above is suggesting to firstly make it safe to perform first aid, and secondly, choosing life over quality of life).

Did you know that if someone is struck by lightning, you can actually re-start their heart?! 

To read a review of lightning protocol for referees visit:

"Causes, signs and symptoms of diabetic emergencies

Hypoglycemia (needs sugar)
Time to develop: 
develops very quickly
Possible cause: 
- took too much insulin
- not eaten enough, or vomited
- more exercise than usual
- strong and rapid/ shallow
Skin condition:
- sweaty, pale and cold
Level of consciousness:
- faintness to unconscious
Other signs and symptoms:
- headache
- confused, irritable and aggressive
- trembling, staggering
- difficulty speaking

Hyperglycemia (needs insulin)
Time to develop:
develops over hours or days
Possible cause: 
- did not take enough insulin
- eating too much food
- less exercise than usual
- casualty has an ongoing illness and the body needs more insulin
- weak and rapid/ deep and sighing
Skin condition:
- flushed, dry and warm
Level of consciousness:
- drowsy, becoming unconscious
Other signs and symptoms:
- thirsty, then nausea and vomiting
- frequent urination
- breath has a nail polish smell"

Hot Stuff

Heat Exhaustion
"- casualty has lost fluid through sweating
- circulation is affected because the blood flows away from the major organs and pools in the blood vessels just below the skin
Signs & Symptoms:
- excessive sweating and dilated pupils
- casualty may complain of dizziness, blurred vision, headache or cramps
- signs of shock, including: cold, clammy skin; weak, rapid pulse; rapid, shallow breathing; vomiting and unconsciousness"
Things you can do to help a conscious person with heat exhaustion:
1. give the conscious casualty water or drinks with electrolytes and carbohydrates.  If the casualty vomits, don't give anything by mouth and get medical help right away.  
2.  place at rest on back in a cool place
3. remove excess clothing and loosen tight clothing at the neck and waist
Things to do if the casualty is unconscious:"
1. If you know what the recovery position is, put the casualty in it. Get medical help right away."

Heat Stroke 
"Life-threatening condition where the body's temperature rises far above normal.  It is caused by prolonged exposure in a hot, humid, and perhaps poorly ventilated environment.  In classic heatstroke, the body's temperature control mechanism fails, sweating stops and the body temperature rises rapidly.  In exertional heatstroke, the body temperature rises rapidly due to heavy physical exertion in high temperatures, even though sweating continues.  
Signs & Symptoms:
- body temperature rapidly rises to 40 degrees C; hot to the touch
- the pulse is rapid and full but gets weaker in later stages
- breathing is noisy
- skin is flushed, hot and dry (classic heatstroke)
- flushed, hot and sweaty (exertional heatstroke)
- casualty is restless and may complain of headache, fatigue, dizziness and nausea
- vomiting, convulsions, unconsciousness"
Things you can do to help while waiting for help:
- move the casualty to a cool, shaded place
- cool the casualty - remove outer clothing and immerse the casualty in cold water up to the chin & watch closely
- When the body feels cool to touch, cover with a dry sheet 
- or if the above things are not possible: 
- cover the person with wet sheets and fan the sheets to increase cooling
- sponge the casualty with cool water; particularly in the armpits, neck and groin areas

Emergency Childbirth
hah just kidding people.. 

[St. John Ambulance (2011). First Aid: Reference Guide. Ottawa: Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication.]

Lastly for this lengthy post: Brook Calibaba is moving from Kamloops to Victoria.  
If you want to say see you later, do so before August 15th!!  Good Luck Brook!
& a shout-out to Mrs. Farber: Hope you are feeling better and getting over catching what Neil had!

Friday, 3 August 2012


So, about 5 hours away from the start of the Aug Long Weekend Tournament.

Welcome to all the officials participating. The tournament bills itself as Canada's largest adult tournament, and it could not happen without the efforts of dedicated referees and Assistant Referees.

Not scheduled for any games (recovering remember), but will be around taking pictures.

Enjoy the tournament and enjoy the sunshine!

None of my two readers will know this song...

Finally, make sure we're man managing to avoid problems...